15 weeks + insecurities

Well, I am 15 weeks!

I keep thinking I am further along than I am because my belly is so large. It is giving me an unrealistic feeling that I am almost done with this pregnancy. It isn't that I hate being pregnant, it is just that this pregnancy is completely DIFFERENT than my last. With Ava, everything was beautiful- even when I went into preterm labor. I didn't feel a thing. Perfect. With the twosies, I am still cramping. I get nauseous every once in a while. The aches and pains are 100X worse than what I ever felt with Ava. They always say that no two pregnancies are the same. Which brings me to my next thought.

I was searching for celebrities who have gotten big during their pregnancies (completely normal). I really think that those people, not all celebs, who stay stick thin are aliens... But it is just how their bodies handle being pregnant and I need to not have my "haterade" in the morning.
Take Kim Kardashian for instance. It isn't that she got big, she is pregnant and she looks completely normal for a pregnant woman. I have never been much of a fan of hers until she was pregnant. She is beautiful and I believe she will be a wonderful mommy. Way to go Kim!
Jessica Simpson is another woman who is perceived to "get big" when she is pregnant. I hate the media. She is another beautiful pregnant woman. Why can't the media and society see that this is a NORMAL pregnancy!!??
Pink! OMG. She is such a cool woman. She is also amazing, but was seen as "too big" according to the media.
All of these women are/were proud of their bellies during pregnancy. They wore amazingly tight clothes that hugged their bellies snug for the entire world to see. The media makes a woman feel shameful for being "big" during their pregnancy. Why? Why do they do this? This is one time in a woman's life where we need to feel beautiful, appreciated, and loved by all no matter big or small.
Kate Middleton is percieved as being too small... As much as I would like to agree, I don't. This is the way her body is during pregnancy.
Point is every woman is different. Every pregnancy is different. To all the pregnant women out there, don't succumb to "media" and "society's" expectation of how much weight you should/shouldn't gain. Pregnancy is a natural event in life where we need to not worry about weight or anything else.

We all have our insecurities: you feel you are too big, too small, your boobs aren't perfect, your feet are too big. It is normal to feel this way and don't beat yourself up over these insecurities that society has given you. Some things can change, but others cannot. Be proud of who you are no matter what your doctors, clothing size, shoe size, "friends", "family" (sometimes are the worse), and what magazines tell you. Be healthy and love who you are, especially when you are pregnant. 

Back to me...

What makes me feel good? I feel good for getting on the eliptical machine. Obviously, I am not doing it to stay "small" or to lose weight. I get on to feel good. I like it... quit telling me to stop! I will stop when I damn well feel like I need quit. I don't even break a sweat. It is like "mall walking". 

Dreams- I woke up this morning with a horrible thought. Baby B was suffocated. It makes me cry thinking about it, but I have been worried about my little twosie ever since I saw the ultrasound. B looked a little squished, but if it were any cause for alarm the Dr would have made my appointment to see the perinatologist earlier than a month away. Right? 

I haven't been feeling them as much the past two weeks, but the ultrasound proved they were fine! So I need to quit worrying. 

Growth- The twosies are the size of an apple now. Well, 2 apples. The amazing development that happens from day one of conception is a miracle. To think that something so small is able to pee, react to light, have a heart beat, and can move is so beautiful. 

Placement- Baby A is in front of baby B. They are to my belly button. 

Oh, I have no rights to these photos I saves from Google images. ;)